10:53 a.m. - 2004-09-27
Cockroaches, the new white meat
Quote of the minute: �(In elementary school) I once purposely peed outside the urinal as an act of civil disobedience for being scolded for sniffing fruit scented markers. What did they expect? They were fruit scented! If you don't want kids to sniff markers, make them smell like ass, not grapes.� Zach Braff
Not-So-Common-Sense-Of-The-Day: Leaving an unopened can of Sprite in your car during 95 degree weather will in fact cause a small nuclear bomb of sticky soda to cover your leather interior. Pass it on.
What a superb week that was. I�m going along just fine and dandy when here comes Karma to stop by and take a dump on my lawn. I hate that. A) it�s karma (helloooo?) so that means I deserve the big fat dump and B) No one likes to clean up their own mess.
I took some very very bad advice a few years ago from an EX EX EX EX friend. Ahem. And ex-boss. That�s kind of important too. Anyhoooooo, it came back and bit me in the butt. I received a summons last Wednesday that said I was being charged with 15 counts of fraud.
Whoa. I mean. Fucking Whoa.
I�ve seen a lawyer, tried pleading ignorance (which IS true in this case, but doesn�t seem to get you far in real life as it does in the movies). After hearing what the sentencing is (fucking sentencing????!!!!) my attorney convinced me to plead guilty on one count so my plea bargain will be a misdemeanor and $3000 in restitution.
I�d go into it more, but the absolute shame and anger I have over this issue is more than I can share. So there. That totally rhymed.
My court date is 10/19 and hopefully all will go according to plan and I can walk away from this with some debt to the state, some shame to my name (what�s with the rhyming dude?), and a very valuable lesson learned. Or some shit like that.
I�m making light of it cause I can dammit.
Then I went to Mexico for the weekend to drink off some stress and get a reminder as to what real poverty is. We stayed at some friends house (they just bought it), and while I�m used to renting a house along the beach, this house was right in the middle of town. Two words dude:
Cocka. Roacha�s.
Ew ew ew ew ew ew. I am so tolerant of so many things/inconveniences. I�m really not high maintenance. And I�m not one of those that are worse than high maintenance cause they really are but think they aren�t. I�m just the plain un-high maintenance okay? But cockroaches. Cockroaches man. We�re talking HUNDREDS. Some dead. Some not close enough to dead. And big. Big fucking cockroaches. Won�t be staying there again. End of discussion. Label me what you will.
And that�s all I have to say.
